Grieving In Isolation: The New Norm

​I cannot accept this “New Norm”. I cannot accept that my life will no longer be the same because you told me the boogie man is outside and the boogie man is so big that no one can see him and he is so dangerous that we all have to hide from him, and if you don’t hide from him, shame on you. You are now subjected to social demonization.  You are now a pariah because you refuse to accept these boundaries that have been set almost overnight.  Shut up and take this check and sit at home and binge watch Netflix.   Yes, and your children, set them in front of the computer for eight hours a day.  You aren’t qualified to teach your children? But you must.  The New Norm is the standard. Your daddy died? Yes. Sorry to hear that, move along please.  No, the boogie man did not kill him, but the New Norm protocol is: you are not allowed to grieve with your family, air hugs only, text messages, and tears cried alone in your room while the New Norm flaunts his muscles in the streets.  Pushing back any naysayer or independent thinker who challenges the boogie man. 

The power of the pen is strong. No I haven’t seen anyone die from the boogie man.  But I have been flooded with stories on social media, the radio, and newspapers of his destruction.  The Boogie Man is bad; he will kill your aging parents.  Yes, keep them locked up, do not physically interact with them.  The pen wrote that the Boogie man’s victims are being bulldozed into refrigerated trucks and dumped into mass graves.  Far be it for me to challenge the Boogie man especially during an election year.  I say the Boogie Man can kiss my glass of freshly juiced ginger, lemon, and honey.  I will not accept the Boogie Man or the New Norm.  You will have to force them on me.  They will take advantage of me and fill me with suspicion of my neighbors and friends. He will desensitize my children while over stimulating them.  My parents will die a slow lonely death all the while I will be labeled extreme and reckless, because I do not accept the boogie man and I will not abide by the New Norm, because I refuse to live a life in solitude under the guise of being “virtually” socially connected with people who probably wouldn’t call me, hug me, console me even if I was right in front of them.  The New Norm will not be my reality. 

​I need you!

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Reshelle Abdul-Malik

Reshelle is the editor of A Message from Makkah.  She is also the administrator for Makkah International Institute.  Reshelle is a masters degreed educator with with over ten years experience teaching domestically and abroad.  She is a mother of 9 children, wife, and sister.